There have been many articles written about funerals and funeral etiquette, but what about if you need to attend a wake? These events can be just as, if not more, intimidating when it comes to attending. This is because, for most of us, it is an entirely new experience. We ant to be respectful and do what is expected, but how do we know what that is? As directors of funeral homes in O'Fallon, MO. we understand how dauting this can be. Today we are going to cover some of the basic etiquette of a wake. 

What is a Wake? 



We first need to talk a little but about what a wake is. A wake is a service that happens before the funeral. It could be held at the funeral home or a private residence. Traditionally, wakes are a time for family and friends to keep watch over the deceased person. These events are typically more relaxed and casual than the actual funeral services and can last from a few hours to overnight. Guests come and go as the please between the set hours. 

What to Take to a Wake 

For wakes, practical gifts are much more appreciated than flowers. These gifts could include food items such as casseroles, sandwiches, fruit, baked goods, or other edible things the family (and perhaps guests) can eat. You can also being a sympathy card for the family. These are a nice way to help the family feel love and supported. 

While flowers are always a nice touch to a funeral, they are not the best thing to being to a wake. This may require the family to have to find something to put them in, or if they are already in a basket, the family has to find a space for them. This can cause more stress on the family at the wake. If you wish for the family to have flowers, send the flowers ahead of time. 

What to Wear to a Wake 

Although the wake is less formal than the funeral service, you still need to make sure you are dressed appropriately. This doesn’t mean you have to dress in all black, but a wake is still a somber event so bright, crazy colors are not the best choice. Stick with darker colors. 

Also, while you don’t have to be as formal as the funeral attire, things like flip flops, torn jeans, shorts, baseball caps, etc. are not the best choices and should not be worn. When getting dressed, think business casual and you should be fine. 

How Long Should You Stay at a Wake? 

The amount of time you spend at the wake is up to you. It is mostly determined by how well you knew the deceased and your relationship to them. If you were not very close, you could stop by the wake for 10-15 minutes to drop off a casserole and offer your condolences. If you were very close, you may wish o stay the entire time. 

If you would like more information on wakes either at private residences or funeral homes in O'Fallon, MO., give us a call or come by anytime. We are here and always available to help you with your needs.